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- NAKM: Apr. 1, 2025
NAKM: Apr. 1, 2025
Introducing Too Soon? & the Movies that May Be Too Soon
Too Soon?
Not all movies are made for all kids. My girls struggle with anything slightly scary. And movies that aren’t that scary can still have triggers.
Any scene with a creature in a closet or under the bed will cause me several sleepless weeks. I can’t imagine showing my girls the clown doll scene in Poltergeist. I saw the film at age five, and both clowns and dolls still creep me out. That imagery would ruin my sweet summer children.
On the other hand, our seven-year-old neighbor thrives on scares. He forced his dad to show him The Thing — which he loved. His dad asked me for recommendations that are scary and maybe a little violent but don’t push the boundaries too far. That prompted me to start a new recommendation group: Too Soon?
I’ll recommend movies that don’t walk the line. They step over it. It’s up to you to decide if your child is ready and capable of handling characters, scenes, and moments that invoke kindertrauma or might lead to uncomfortable questions that we don’t need to answer yet.
For movies that push the limits, check out my recommendations below. And for more ideas, check out the impressive arrivals list on Paramount Plus this month. You’ll notice I’m including more PG-13 and R movies that I think dads would want to watch with their kids. I will list them as 12+.
Enjoy — but don’t warp your kids too much!
Brendan
Fresh Cuts
Too many recommendations this month — no room for a review!
Streaming 🛜
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In Theaters 📽️
(Apr. 4) A Minecraft Movie
On Disc 📀
(Apr. 1) Mufasa: The Lion King (2024) (6+)
(Apr. 1) Dog Man (2025) (5+)
(Apr. 1) My Hero Academia: You're Next (2024) (12+)
News You Can Use (and Sometimes Booze)
Looney: The team behind the popular new Looney Tunes movie The Day the Earth Blew Up will purchase the rights to Warner Bros. cancelled Coyote Vs. Acme film.
Loonier: Warner Bros. Discovery has removed Looney Tunes classics (1930-69) from Max — presumably for tax reasons. This follows the removal of Sesame Street. Buy physical media.
Simpsons: Disney+ is adding a 24/7 channel to binge Simpsons and purge your free time.
Superman: Test screening rave reviews? No surprise. It’s James Gunn. The guy does not miss.
Trailer: Pixar’s latest. You may have seen the first trailer and thought, “Is this really Pixar?” Apparently people are connecting with the second much more than the first.
Bourbon: The world’s best? High-praise for a low-cost bourbon.
Papa Do Preach!

“If your kid tells you there’s something in their closet…believe them.”
Let’s Get Rec’d!
Check my list before you wreck yourself next family film night.
Too Soon?

Turbo Kid (2015) (12+)
Turbo Kid is a post-apocalyptic wasteland run by a madman. The only savior: A kid on a bike. It plays out like your dream Choose Your Own Adventure book come to life. Because of all the nostalgia, you'd think it's kid-friendly. It's not. Like this newsletter, you'll see a lot of kid-friendly themes, but it's not kid-friendly. If you have kids who can handle over-the-top (but fun) violence, check out Turbo Kid. You'll love the retro vibe that has a sweetness despite the splashing blood. It's now streaming on Prime, Peacock, and a bunch of ad-based movie services.
Too Soon?

Young Sherlock Holmes (1985) (10+)
Young Sherlock Holmes introduces us to a young Sherlock Holmes (surprise!) and John Watson — but this mystery has supernatural and Spielbergian vibes. The famous duo are students at a London Academy when a string of spooky murders take over the city. The violence and hallucinogenic sequences may be a bit too much for younger kids. But it may be worth pushing them forward because the movie is fun. No surprise, given the screenwriter is Chris Columbus (Gremlins, Goonies), the director is Barry Levinson (The Natural, Rain Man), and the executive producer is actually Steven Spielberg (every film you loved as a kid). The good news: Young Sherlock Holmes just arrived on Paramount Plus this month.
Too Soon?

The Breadwinner (2017) (9+)
The Breadwinner will lead to questions. Good questions. Tough questions. The kind you want to handle in-house. The film is about a girl in Afghanistan growing up under Taliban rule in 2011. She chops off her hair to support her family, working as a boy. Her new freedom opens her eyes to the horror around her — and does it in an unflinching and refreshingly honest manner. Despite the heavy content, The Breadwinner remains entertaining because the art is gorgeous and the tone is optimistic. Yes, there is violence. There's also heart and soul. You'll have to rent this modern classic (yes, it's that good) because it just left Peacock today.
For Your Eyes Only
What to watch after THEY go to bed.

Body Heat (1981)
It’s spring. Let’s heat things up. Let’s get sprung. And if this movie doesn’t heat you up, you’re missing some springs.
Lawrence Kasdan followed up writing Raiders of the Lost Ark with his directorial debut, Body Heat. Suddenly, the whips and leather make sense.
Body Heat may be the steamiest movie, but you don’t have to drop a token in to see five more minutes at the local adult bookstore.
It’s sweaty, sultry, seductive. The shot choices crank up the heat while the editing turns up the pressure. Kathleen Turner sizzles as she seduces William Hurt, drawing him into a deadly trap. The tension scorches as she leads him along, slowly at first, before she really gets things going.
Body Heat is a 1940s noir that doesn’t hide the dirty stuff. If you see this one, get your hanky ready — I’m talking about perspiration! But I can’t blame you if you get caught up in the film’s sweaty buildup that leads to a double climax — I’m talking about the story!
Enjoy, Ace!
Stir It Up
A cocktail to get you purring like Kathleen Turner when she says, “You’re not too smart, are you? I like that in a man.”
The Slow Burn
Ingredients:
2 oz bourbon
¼ oz honey syrup
2 dashes Angostura bitters
1 slice of fresh jalapeño
Garnish:
Orange peel garnish
Instructions:
Heat: Muddle the jalapeño lightly in a glass or shaker.
Chill: Add ice and the rest of the ingredients.
Comingle: Stir the contents.
Pour: Strain over a big ice cube.
Garnish: Add an orange peel.
Cheers!